Sickness
by Mad Pirate
Summary: Oh no! Sanji's been kidnapped by an almost all-girl pirate crew!
1. Doooom

Nico Robin had a strange feeling. It was the feeling of…  
  
"impending doom, or something… I dunno…"  
  
Robin started when she heard Nami muttering in her sleep. Yes, that was   
  
exactly what the feeling was like… impending doom…  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Robin and Nami weren't the only ones to feel the "impending doom". Usopp   
  
woke up because something was bothering him in his sleep. He heard Zoro   
  
shifting in his hammock more than it was necessary.   
  
"Hey! Zoro!! You awake?"  
  
Zoro turned over so that he was facing Usopp.  
  
"Yeah, why?"  
  
"Do you have this weird feeling…I dunno, its like… like…"  
  
"Impending doom or something?"  
  
"Yeaahh…."  
  
"Mm hmm…. I was wondering if anyone else felt it too. Maybe something's going   
  
to happen. Whatever it is, we better be ready for it. Whatever it is…"  
  
Zoro yawned and turned over and fell asleep.  
  
Usopp turned over and fell asleep too.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Luffy was awakened by a weird muffled sound. Then he realized he was hungry.   
  
He leaped out of his hammock and shuffled towards Sanji's.   
  
"Hey! Sanji! I'm hungry! Gimme some food!"  
  
Instead of receiving a reply, or a foot in his face, he received nothing.  
  
"Sanji?"  
  
No one was in the hammock  
  
"Hm. Oh well. Maybe he's cooking already!"  
  
Luffy's eyes lightened as he headed upstairs toward the kitchen.  
  
Sanji wasn't in the kitchen. He was in the crow's nest looking out over the   
  
horizon. He was deep in thought. What on earth was that feeling that haunted   
  
him during the night? He didn't even notice Luffy sneaking towards the kitchen.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"HEY WHO MESSED UP MY KITCHEN!?"  
  
This was the wake-up call the next morning. Luffy blearily trumped up the stairs,   
  
chewing on the bones of a fish as he went.  
  
"Hey Sanji, what's the big idea? We're still sleeping!"  
  
Sanji was on him in an instant.  
  
"LUFFY, DID YOU MESS UP MY KITCHEN?!"  
  
Luffy yawned widely and deftly swallowed the fish bones  
  
"Well, no, I don't think so. I was looking for some meat, but I couldn't find it.   
  
Then I did! It was in the fridge!"  
  
Luffy, oblivious of the chef's anger, looked immensely pleased with himself.  
  
"You…are…so…dead…!"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Wellll… I was going to put some NXS in there, but I couldn't quite pull it off… so I   
  
deleted it entirely. You may hate me, but I'll try to put something in there. I can't   
  
neglect my favorite pairing!! The spellings are the way I want them. I don't know   
  
what to call Nico Robin, so I just call her "Robin." Just plain "Nico" seems weird.   
  
It bothers me. Well, read on. Thank you for reading. Arigatou-gojaimas-de! 


	2. Fight!

"*sniff* *sob* Sandzi, 'ow much longer do I hab to do diz? Ow! I cut my finger again!"  
  
Luffy was remorsefully cutting onions. His punishment for the night before.  
  
"Until all the onions in that pile are gone, bonehead."  
  
"d'okie. *sniff* Hoo. Hey Sandzi, 'ow come ondions make peoble cry?"  
  
"No, you see, they don't make people cry, they only make you do, because you're afraid of what's going to happen to you if you DON'T cut those onions, right?"  
  
"Uhh.. dunno. Whuz gonda 'appen to me ib I dun cuz all duh ondions? *sniff sniff*?"  
  
KER-WHAAACK!  
  
Now, Luffy was massaging a large lump on his head, administered by the incredibly agitated cook.  
  
"That times more than you can count. Now continue on."  
  
"Wait Sandzi!! I dunno 'ow to muldibly!"  
  
KER-WHAACK!!  
  
"Clear skies, few clouds, same as yesterday."  
  
Nami looked at the sky and recorded the weather. She sighed  
  
"Geez. so much calm weather, looks like there might be a storm. Hello, what's this?"  
  
Nami looked out onto the horizon. A small black dot was moving towards them.  
  
"Usopp! Get in the crow's nest and tell me what that black dot is!!"  
  
Usopp obediently obeyed.  
  
"Ehh. can't really tell. but its moving pretty fast. Oh wait, its coming into view now. Hey! Its like some giant floating leaf!!"  
  
"A floating LEAF?!"  
  
The crew didn't have much to wait. The "leaf" quickly made its way into full view. By that time, Luffy had also endured his punishment. He had large bumps on his head to prove it.  
  
"Wow! A floating leaf!! On the sea!"  
  
The captain was thrilled. The others, however, didn't seem to have the enthusiasm with meeting the "leaf" as their captain did.  
  
The leaf, with amazing maneuverability, came up to the Going Merry, and neatly stopped on its side. Out of the leaf stepped several pirates, all of them with green hair, all, but one, female.  
  
Sanji couldn't help but make a crack about them.  
  
"*snicker* Hey Zoro, family of yours?"  
  
Zoro clenched his teeth and answered with a poisonous glare.  
  
Luffy didn't seem to chuffed either.  
  
"Hey! Who are you guys! What are you doing on my ship?"  
  
The man, obviously the leader, stepped forward and coolly asked,  
  
"Did you fight Arlong?"  
  
Luffy gave him a straight answer  
  
"You bet I did! And I beat him too! I'm gonna be the King of Pirates!"  
  
Without warning, all the green-haired pirates unsheathed a plethora of strange weapons, all of them resembling leaves. Then their leader spoke  
  
"I am Ebola, leader of the Green-leaf pirates. We have come to avenge the great Arlong"  
  
Then they attacked!  
  
Fortunately, everyone seemed ready. Instant fighting broke out! Although the Straw-hat pirates were outnumbered, they put up a decent fight.  
  
Usopp and Chopper took on four of the green leaf pirates with considerable ease. Chopper changing shape when he needed to, which almost seemed hardly necessary, and Usopp bringing down the others with a few rocks and one dose of "Usopp Noise.  
  
Nami was putting up a good fight herself. She didn't even have to use any of her special "elemental" attacks with her bo.  
  
Luffy, Zoro, and Sanji almost had to put up no fight at all. A few strikes of Luffy's "Gomu-Gomu no Pistol", Zoro's "Oni-Giri", and Sanji's weird, breakdancing move knocked out the rest of the Greenies.  
  
Luffy was surprised  
  
"Hey! How come you guys are so weak?"  
  
Ebola laughed and snapped his fingers. Another set of his pirates leaped out of their "ship." With the same ease, the crew beat them easily. Again, Ebola called in another set. Again, the Straw-Hat pirates defeated them.  
  
Finally, Ebola sighed and jumped onto the roof of the cabin. He smirked and glanced down at the incredibly bored Luffy, who was picking his nose.  
  
"Hmph. I thought your crew would have more to it than a bunch of fighters. Oh well, I'll have to exterminate you for good!"  
  
"Hey!! We're not just a bunch of fighters!! Hold on."  
  
Luffy turned around and counted his crew members on his fingers  
  
"Oh..okay. yeah, we have a captain, a swordsman, a navigator, uhhh. Hey, Usopp! What are you?"  
  
Slightly perturbed, Usopp replied  
  
"The greatest Captain Usopp! Lord of the Grand Line!!"  
  
Luffy shrugged and turned back to Ebola.  
  
".Uh, and him, and a cook, and a doctor, and."  
  
"OKAY!!..hold on, did you say you had a cook?  
  
Ebola was incredibly annoyed by Luffy's stupidity, but changed at the word, "cook"  
  
Luffy, proud of his crew, grinned.  
  
"Yup!! And he has to be the best cook there is!! He even makes rotten food taste good!!"  
  
Ebola smirked  
  
"Hm.. then I'll just take your 'cook' and leave I suppose. that, and then my crew will be complete."  
  
"I don't think so."  
  
Suddenly, two hands appeared right next to Ebola's feet. With one smooth movement, they tripped him, while a dozen more, also materializing out of the deck, held him tight.  
  
"N-no! Not.Nico Robin?!"  
  
Robin smirked. The two had obviously met.  
  
Luffy had another thing to say  
  
"Hahaha, if this scene were made into a movie, that line would be a real groaner."  
  
Luffy's eyes lit up  
  
"Yeah! And we have Nico Robin!! I was going to tell you that, but you didn't let me, so."  
  
Ebola throbbed a vein in his temple, seeing as that was almost the only thing he could do at the moment.  
  
Almost  
  
"Pirates!! Code green, zero-zero-nine!"  
  
Suddenly, nine scantily clad lady-pirates popped out of nowhere next to their leader. They all took out scimitars and slashed at the hands. Nico drew them back quickly. Then all the piratesses each took out a small ball. They simultaneously threw them at the ground. The whole ship was shrouded in a cloud of smoke.  
  
Luffy was the first to react  
  
"HEY!!*cough cough* What a dirty *cough* trick!!"  
  
Although she couldn't see very well, Robin, knowing what Ebola was aiming for, began searching for Sanji.  
  
Too bad he was already gone.  
  
Eehhh.. I dunno what to think about this chapter. it's not bad, but not really good either. Gomen Nasai for the idiotic name. Ebola.. honestly.. well, I couldn't think of a better one. Sooooo. bear with me! (geez, naming a pirate after a disease.) If you are still reading this, DOOOMMMMOOOO AAARRRIIIGGGAAATOOOUUU GGGOOOJJAAAIIIMMMAAASSSS- DEEEEHH!!!!!!!!!! Wow, you must be able to take in some bad writing. Well, the coming chapters SHOULD be better. I hope. 


End file.
